Updated: Feb 18, 2022
What is the one thing that holds some people back in their financial lives?
I was asked what should men know about women and financial literacy in a podcast by Donna Peters this week.
Until about 12,000 years ago, this is how we survived.
- labor division was based on sex:
- men hunted game, learned skills to kill and
- women gathered edible plants, learned skills to blend in with the group.
It’s the hunter and gatherer mentality.
Fast forward to today:
- men focus on winning and money and
- women focus on being well-liked and being socially accepted.
- In some cases, the roles are reversed, but there is still a division of labor.
What holds some women back and prevents us from leaving the safety of the pack?
Loss aversion can cause people/investors to behave irrationally and make bad decisions, or worse, make no decision at all.
In other words, women would rather not lose money, (for example, stay in a bad marriage, stay in a bad job) than make money.
If you don’t take risk, there is no reward.
I know, I felt this way. I felt stuck.
This is how I got out of the mud (tools of change):
- Needed to create some urgency. (My husband might leave me if I didn’t figure out my purpose.)
- Needed to figure out what I wanted and I wrote it down on a piece of paper. (We have to want something in order to hunt.)
- Learned from others more experienced and learned their stories (I reached out to #harvardbusinessschool alumnae who were 10 years older than me.)
- Ask your partner want he/she thinks you should do. Or better yet, go tell someone what you think his or her talent is. #RandomActsOfKindness (Sometimes we need a little nudge, a recognition of our talent, a little encouragement to go a certain way or direction.)
Some husbands have encouraged their wives to start a business based on their talents and uniqueness and later ended up working for their wives!
If I didn’t figure out what I wanted, I would have lived a life with no purpose and a life full of regret.
There is a reason why the quote from Bronnie Ware’s book The Top Regrets of the Dying, is quoted so much. In her book, she reveals the biggest and most common regret of the dying,
“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
Let me help you get unstuck. Women need to support other women. I'm here to help.
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