Last Friday was the most unusual day for me.
It started with:
- a walk with a friend,
- a coffee with a friend,
- a lunch with a friend,
- a call with a friend, and
- then a game of Mahjong where I won with three jokers.
I had this natural high by the end of the day, and I couldn’t figure out why.
The answer came to me Monday night while reading my friend Linda Rossetti's new book, "Dancing with Disruption."
Reflecting on my time working at New York hedge funds, I recalled feeling isolated and surrounded by men, who said stuff with no filter, and who often said ridiculous things.
Basically, the writers from the movie "Trading Places", a 1983 American comedy film directed by John Landis, with a screenplay by Timothy Harris and Herschel Weingrod. " summed up what is like to work on Wall Street perfectly ...when they crafted this statement,
When Dan Aykroyd tells Eddie Murphy when they are about to go into a trading pit,
- Never show any sign of weakness. Always go for the throat.
- Buy low, sell high.
- Fear, that's the other guy's problem.
- Nothing you have ever experienced can prepare you for the unbridled carnage you are about to witness.
- In this building, it's either kill or be killed.
- You make no friends in the pits, and you take no prisoners.
I just put my head down and did the work;
You are only as good as your last trade, which made me good for a long time.
But I was lonely.
Seven years ago, during a significant career transition, I discovered Linda's first book, "Women and Transition: Reinventing Work and Life." Finally, someone had put into words the challenges of navigating life's transitions, making me feel understood for the first time.
Even then, I couldn't quite grasp the profound impact of last Friday's natural high until I read Linda's second book, "Dancing with Disruption." She shared a story about a man in San Francisco who lost his sight but found that accepting his blindness expanded his world. His words resonated deeply: "As strange as it may sound, I see so much more now."
Those words captured my own experience.
When I went through my transition to becoming an advisor, my confidence which I exuded once in NYC, had evaporated over the last few years until now…
As I fully transitioned to investment management and as a financial advisor with my firm, “transition is about how we see ourselves. Through this, my confidence has grown - this transition taught me to see value in myself,” These are the blind man's words because he is articulating my experience perfectly. “These steps helped me, over time, reframe value, my own and what I could offer others.”
I felt good last Friday with deep connections with friends and confidence that I could help others.
Authenticity, connection, and confidence is the thing that fuels my relationships, and I'm so grateful for my transition and that I traded places. The photo is in front of the famous building used in the movie, Trading Places.
If you are in transition and don't have a close relationship with a financial advisor, please reach out!
Empowering women to take control of their future!
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